There's only one thing I want to change about you, and that's your last name. Would you grab my arm, so I can tell my friends I've been touched by an angel? So if you like Legos too, Lego build a relationship. My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in. You know what I do for a living? I'm a thief, and I'm here to steal your heart. If this bar were a meat market, you are the prime rib. If you were words on a page, you'd be what they call FINE PRINT! Most people like to watch the Olympics because it only happens once every 4 years, but I'd rather talk to you because the chance of meeting someone like you only happens once in a lifetime. Me without you is like a nerd without braces, a shoe without laces, and a sentence without spaces. There isn't a word in the dictionary for how amazing you look. Is your dad a drug dealer? ‘Cause you're so dope you make me high! Are you a banana? Because I find you a-peeling. Do you work at Starbucks? Because I really like you a latte. You know what? If I were a cat, I'd spend all 9 lives with you. If happiness started with an H, then why does mine start with U? I was wondering if you had an extra heart. Wow, if being sexy was a crime, you'd be guilty as charged! If I had a star for every time you made me smile, I'd have a whole galaxy in my hand. Was your dad a boxer? Because damn, you're a knockout! I've been looking at your eyes all night long because I've never seen such dark eyes with so much light in them. Now I see that I am very much alive, and heaven has been brought to me. For a moment I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Can I follow you home? ‘Cause my parents always told me to follow my dreams. You'll never know who could be falling in love with your smile. Can I take your picture to prove to my friends that angels do exist? But in ten years, I'll love another girl. So I'm going to need your name and number for insurance purposes. I was so enchanted by your beauty that I ran into that wall over there. Is there an airport nearby or is that my heart taking off? Excuse me, are you a parking ticket? Because you have fine written all over you. Can I ask for directions? *Girl: "To where?"* To your heart. Sorry, but you owe me a drink. *Girl: "Why?"* Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine. My buddies bet me that I wouldn't be able to start a conversation with the most beautiful girl in the bar. But when you came along, you definitely turned me on! For some reason, I was feeling a little off today. Well apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you. They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Do you know what I am made of? Boyfriend material. I am not a photographer, but I can picture you and me together. Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everything else disappears. Do you like raisins? How do you feel about a date? Aside from being sexy, what else do you do? Hold it, I think you have something in your eye. There's something wrong with my phone, can you fix it? Your number's not in it. If you were Christmas, then I would be the Grinch who stole you. How on earth do you do that?!? *Girl, confused: "What?"* Look so exquisitely beautiful! Thanks! I just want to remember the exact moment I met the woman of my dreams. *Ask her for the time* 9:15? So today is January 30th, 2023, at 9:15 PM. Do I know you? ‘Cause you look just like my next girlfriend.
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